Treading Water and Facing Fear – Warrior Reflection

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Kristin here. I did my first OCR a few years ago and fell in love. It changed the way I viewed fitness and has driven me to a host of new experiences. Racing and subsequent training for races ignited a love for running trails, bodyweight and strength training workouts, and a desire to be a part of a “team.” The greatest gift is awakening the dreamer in me who welcomes physical and mental challenges.

Achievements

  • Faced my fear of a medical diagnosis.
  • Worked on strengthening my body after tearing my ACL.

Facing fear:  I discovered my avoiding sharing and facing what was happening to my body was fueling a host of problems, leaving me frozen. Once out in the open I felt like a veil lifted and learned that I am a fighter. (More on this in set-back section)

Setbacks

Strengthening knee: I still have to have surgery, but am 10x stronger than I was a year ago.

  • Health issues and a diagnosis.
  • No races and limited running.

My health issues and symptoms, some of which had been happening for years, culminated into what I think of as the perfect storm. Many I blew off as aging and perceived weakness. Non-technical symptoms: tremors in my limbs, vision problems (shaking eyes), numbness in my arms and legs, balance issues leading to falls, problems walking, a seizure… After a host of specialists and tests, my neurologist believes it is multiple sclerosis. We are using the brain scan as a baseline to see if and how the lesions on my brain change, as well as if my symptoms or episodes worsen. I am not fully accepting of the diagnosis, but knew that something was terribly wrong with my body. I am happy to know that it was not a tumor or stroke. For now, I see it as something I deal with and get on with life!

My running has been what seems to be a series of downs. My knee rebels, swells, and knocks me down. I did not do any races because of it and this was a spirit-breaker for me.

I need to listen  to my body and adapt.